How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb? This old joke has been around for a while. I don’t profess to know about the various Christian denominations listed, so some of the punch-lines went over my head! By posting this joke, I don’t mean disrespect to any denomination. The bit about Christian Scientists really made me laugh, because for those who don’t know the teachings, ”there is no matter” can be taken out of context and hence the joke. The video says much… enjoy!
Question: How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?
Amish: What’s a light bulb?
Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.
Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air.
Christian Scientists: Two. One to awaken the other from the dream that light could ever originate from a material element.
Episcopals: Eight. One to call the electrician, and seven to say how much they liked the old one better.
Lutherans: None. Lutherans don’t believe in change.
Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved — you can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.
Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.
Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
Pentecostals: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.
Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favour of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.